25 July 2007

One day an old man boarded a bus.
As he was going up the steps,
one of his shoes slipped off.
The door closed and the bus moved off
so he was unable to retrieve it.
The old man calmly took off his other shoe
and threw it out of the window.
A young man on the bus saw what happened,
and could not help going up to the old man
and asking, "I noticed what you did, sir.
Why did you throw out your other shoe?"
The old man promptly replied,
"So that whoever finds them will be able to use them."

The old man in the story understood
a fundamental philosophy for life :
Do not hold on to something
simply for the sake of possessing it

because you do not wish others to have it.

We lose things all the time.
The loss may seem to us grievous and unjust initially,
but loss only happens so that positive changes can occur in our lives.
We should not always assume that losing something is bad,
because if things do not shift, we'll never become better people
or experience better things.

That's not to say of course that we only lose "bad" things;
It simply means that in order for us to mature emotionally
and spiritually, and for us to contribute to the world,
the interchange between loss and gain is necessary.

Like the old man in the story, we have to learn to let go.
Maybe God decided it was time for the old man to lose his shoe.
Maybe this happened to add momentum to a series
of events leading to a better pair of shoes for the old man.
Maybe the search for another pair of shoes
would lead the old man to a great benefactor.
Maybe someone else needed the shoes more.

Whatever the reason, we can't avoid losing things.
The old man understood this.
One of his shoes had gone out of his reach.
The remaining shoe would not have been much help to him,
but it would be a cherished gift to a homeless person
desperately in need of protection from the ground.

Hoarding possessions does nothing to make us or the world better.
We all have to decide constantly if some things
or people have run their course in our lives
would be better off with others.

We then have to
muster the courage
to give them away.

21 July 2007

My world collapsed when I saw him with his ex-gf.
But surprisingly, I felt a sense of freedom too.
I don't have to bound myself to who he'll choose anymore.

I really appreciate God for carrying me thru all this testings.
Coz when I look back, I don't see His footprints.
Hee..
I feel good.
I actually questioned why too..
Am I not reacting to how I should??
HAha..

Feeling tired after I've email my last encouragements to him.
yaR, Jia you! Don't disappoint her okay!
Most importantly, Don't disappoint God.
Really pray that my emails will encourage you.

YawnzzzZZZzz....
I'm really tired.
Good night to all.
Tml will be a brand new day for me!

20 July 2007

Wanna find out your Basic Gifts
so that you can serve God
more effectively?

Check out this site!

If you already know,
visit the link to
refresh your memory today!
Also to find out what
dangers you could be facing...

18 July 2007

Ha..I had two blunders
with regards to shutter bus today.

1st :
I tap my ez-link card on a shutter bus!
The beep was so loud that
it caught many to attention...
*blush*

2nd :
Its a shutter bus to Bedok.
I was the only one still on the bus
when it reaches the terminal.
The driver had to yell at me to get out!
*shame shame*

It's ok, tomorrow I'll be an "angel".
Literally with wings.
Err..just bcoz VVVVVIP is comin.
Kaozzz...-.-!!!
Gotta slp early tonight.

Sunray, you rest early too.
Hope you'll be regular in doing your QT tho.
Ha..I will pray for you and "mangojuiceplease" before I sleep.
Pray that she'll change to be a better person.
Pray that you'll allow God to decide your life.
I know you don't feel like thinking of this thing.
It's not really you don't feel like.
But you just wanna avoid it and "hoping"
somehow it'll be solved.
Well, it'll only be solved unless you allow God to intervene.
But that's if you face the situation in the 1st place.
Yah..naggy...
If I ever say this to you,
you're gonna hate me.
Okay, I'll let the H.S. to contact you.
Haha..Nite nite.

17 July 2007

What is my purpose on earth..?
A purpose-driven life.
This book I saw it in bookstores everywhere
for umpteen times, but somehow, I didn't feel like
reading it becoz the cover is ugly.

This is what we meant by,
"Do not judge a book by it's cover."

And thank God that by chance,
I happen to flip thru it bcoz I'm bored
while I'm @ Dempsey.

It's love @ 1st sight!
I fallen in love with the book immediately!
The following day,
without hesitation,
I bought it at Times @ Centrepoint.

Actually, I wanted to borrow the book from Mr. Phay,
but oh well, seems alittle inconvenient now.
Didn't want him to think that I'm trying
all means and ways to get close to him.
Didn't want him to have a chance to find me a bother.
Didn't want him to avoid me la.

Wanted to have a heart-to-heart chat
but don't think it's a good time.
Wanted him to be happy.
Wanted him to have faith in God.

Nvm about him..
Why did I side track again..
Ahhh...ok, the book.
Yes, it's a highly recommended book by me.
A must-read.
It's the best-seller book for a reason.
I mean millions of reasons man!

*thinking*
God really did place this book
in my house at the right time.
If I possess the book earlier on,
most likely it'll be lying with the webs..lalala~

15 July 2007

I went Dempsey Hill today.
Cool cozy place for Ben & Jerry ice-cream.
I was so excited and I msged him
that I'll bring him there someday.
Well, a super whoooper impulsive act.
I'm always like that.
Must change ahh..haiyooo...

Yest went Geylang for supper w my sisters.
He actually msged me while I'm having dinner w Darius.
And b4 Ru reached my place, he called me.
International call from Genting woh..
Of coz I'm like so excited!

He learnt that I was abt to go out.
He called again 5mins later, just to check who I'm goin out with.
I can sense his insecurities..
@ d same time, I'm glad that he's still interested to know who I'm with.

Maybe to some of you, that's checking.
But to me, it's a caring & a heartwarming act.
I really appreciate that.
His one call = 24hrs Happiness
It's pretty temp but did help me to smile for the entire day.

How I wished he'll call once everyday.
Hee.. The flesh always wants more..
Hiyah.. Nothing will satisfy..

Today Pastor C. actually shared about his
love relationship.
His secret tip:
Commit his love life to the Lord's hand.
He prayed, if she the one, then let me have
more chance to see her and get to know her better.

I must also pray that if he's the one,
then Lord, you'll change him to become
a more decisive person.

Moulding needs time.
So I'll have to be patient..
While the Lord is teaching me in that area.
Patience.

Love is Patient.
Arghhh...
Now daily, I'll just draw strength from Him.
While waiting, I'll feed myself with God's word.

Daily..
For so many days,
I've been clinging close to God.
Yup, sometimes doubts does came to my mind,
and I can be a lil emo for awhile.

But the low & emo parts are gettin shorter & lesser..
While my prayers are getting longer & stronger..

No wonder i read somewhere which says,
"Its not the result that matters most,
Its the process."

Yes.
The process of waiting for him.
The process of finding out how much do I really love him.
The process of asking God for direction.
The process of admitting I miss him again & again.
The process of making things for him.
The process of praying for him.
The process of living without him.
The process of drawing strength from God.
The process of accepting the fact of not prosessing him.
The process of knowing him all over again.

I walk past Canterbury again.
They're having 15% disc.
To buy ot not to buy...?
Buy?
Not buy?
Buy?
Not Buy?
Buy?
Not buy?
Buy?
Not Buy?
Buy?
Not buy?
Buy?
Not Buy?
Buy?
Not buy?
Buy?
Not Buy?
...?

13 July 2007

Zinc, thanks for your comforting words..
Even he says I'll be safe in God's arms..
My 6th sense tells me that
he had already made the choice..

3yrs VS 6mths..

Wahaha..
Think and you'll know who will win..

But love is not a game..
So its not game over..

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding,
In all your ways, acknowledge Him and He will make your paths straight."

That's a comforting word from the Lord.
The flesh sees and believes..
But the wise believes and sees..

Today may seems unspecial..
Today may seems unsignificant..
Today may seems unworthy..
But today will make a difference..
Today plays a part
in tomorrow!
It may seems like a small role that's not worthy to be mentioned..
It may seems like there's no signs of sucess..

But today is created by God.

Thank God for TODAY!

Its supposed to be a surprise for him...
I bought heart-shaped chocolate biscuits and Vits
specially for him to bring to this trip....

I don't mind if he doesn't like it at all..
I don't mind if he throws it away...
I don't mind if he tells me, hey stop doing that..
I don't mind if he scold me straight in the face...
But I really DO MIND that he's avoiding me NOW!!!

Why has he gotta do that..
I'm trying to treat you as a very close friend..
Not trying to grab your sympathy...
Not hoping for anything in return...

I want you to be happy..
Simple as that..
If you hate me..
Tell me..
DON'T AVOID ME!!!

I feel a million times worst NOW!!!!!!

hmph...
maybe i asked for it..
maybe i thot he still have a teeeny weeeny bit of liking for me...
maybe i'm still in my dreams...

WAKE UP!!!
Hey, you are the one who needs to wake up!!!
NOT HIM...

He has a choice.
His choice is not you.
Okay?
You got it?
So just wake up your damn stupid idiot non-sensical lame hopeless irritaing and disgusting idea!!!

*heart broke*
I did not shed a tear.
Rem this, when the day i no longer shed a tear is the day my heart will start to harden..
harden till the day i will no longer have any feel when i look right into your eyes..

I have to be strong.
Yup, please just enjoy the trip.
Still I'll pray for your safety.
Still I'll miss you.
Still I'll treasure you.
Still I'll be me.
Still the same.
Still...

12 July 2007

Just came back from Zouk.
Smoke-free! Shiok man.
Whoa, cant believe its so crowded.
Haven't been to Mambo night for like donkey years.

Had fun with my colleagues.
They're really fun loving people.
Can imagine, this is like my 3rd or 4th time
meeting them, and we're planning to go Bangkok
together this September.
Waha..

But frankly, we just click well.
Thank God for granting me favour
with my colleagues and bosses.
But then, I think its all not that great
to be a popular B.A.

Atriums, promotions...
Next month is gonna be like havoc.
No weekends..
Arggh...
Good lah..
Maybe..
Haha..
At least I wouldn't miss him so much..
Sighh..

He's now, this very sec on msn..
I just msged him..
No reply..
Is he that busy..?
I don't get attention from him anymore.
So sad.
We used to talk every night.
We used to be really friendly.
I hope its because he's busy.

Please work hard and do well.
I'll be fine.
Don't worry about me.
(maybe he nv worry in the 1st place..)

Hey, I'm a little long-winded eh..
Think I'm still abit high from the
Lychee Martini and Vodka Ribeana..

I realised I'm not lonely when I'm alone.
But I feel lonely when I'm in a crowd.
I missed him so so much just now..
Hope he's doing fine..
and very well..

Good night yaR..
*imaginary*
-bear hug-

11 July 2007

He called me last night.
That was super duper whooper unexpected..
Ok, he's really very observant.
He even knew I changed his ringtone.
Ya, my stupid big mouth.

Actually, I change it becoz
I don't wanna get too excited when he called.
But when I saw his name on my hp,
I'm like flew from my room to my bro's room
to charge my hp and return his call.

Ha, if anyone saw me..
You'll be laughing & rolling on the floor.
Anyway, thank God that he's willing
to share his probs with me.
Able to pray for him,
I'm really very very contended.

I hope he'll continue to be a confident man.

Please jia you oh~
I will always support you! Ü
Aja Aja Fighting!!

10 July 2007

Your Five Variable Love Profile

Propensity for Monogamy:
Your propensity for monogamy is high.
You find it easy to be devoted and loyal to one person.
And in return, you expect the same from who you love.
Any sign of straying, and you'll end things.

Experience Level:
Your experience level is high.
You've loved, lost, and loved again.
You have had a wide range of love experiences.
And when the real thing comes along,
you know it!

Dominance:
Your dominance is low.
This doesn't mean you're a doormat,
just balanced.You know a relationship
is not about getting your way.
And you love to give your sweetie
a lot of freedom.

Cynicism:
Your cynicism is low.
You are an eternal optimist when
it comes to love and romance.
No matter how many times you've been hurt,
- you're never bitter.
You believe in one true love,
your perfect soulmate.
And if you haven't found true love yet,
you know you will soon.

Independence:
Your independence is medium.
In relationships, you need both "me time" and "we time."
You usually find it easy to be part of a couple.
But occasionally you start to feel a little smothered.

Again it's so accurate..
But one thing is, I don't get bitter easily
bcoz I'm forgetful..
Or maybe put it nicer,
I'm quick to forgive? Ha..

O, its gettin' addictive man.
I'm obsessed with personality testsss..

Give it a try too!
http://www.blogthings.com/thefivevariablelovetest/

Your Love Life Secrets Are

Looking back on your life, you will only have one true love.

Although you may have been hurt before, you tend to bring very little scars into new relationships.

It's important to you that your lover is very attractive. You like to have someone to show off.

In fights, you are able to walk away and calm down. You are able to weather the storm.

Getting over a break-up doesn't take long. Easy come, easy go.

Your Love Life Secrets, Revealed

Oh gosh, this is very much talking abt me.

Esp. the part about little scars

and attractive partner. Haha..

Yah, I used to like to parade with my boy.

I like the feeling of people envying me.

Err...that's was the past okay..

I'm very sure I've got a breakthrough in this area.

Anyway, I'm kinda getting obsess with this test stuff.

Heh, pretty neat.

09 July 2007

Instructions:
Put an ‘X’ to those that apply to you.
Have you ever:

(X) Smoked a cigarette. - One puff
( ) Smoked a cigar.
( ) Smoked sheesha.
( ) Made out with a member of the same sex.
( ) Crashed a friend’s car.
( ) Stolen a car.
(X) Been in love.
(X) Been dumped.
(X) Shoplifted. - Yah..3 ice-creams from Blk 123
( ) Been fired.
( ) Been in a fist fight.
( ) Snuck out of your parents’ house.
(X) Had feelings for someone who didn’t reciprocate them.
( ) Been arrested.
( ) Made out with a stranger.
( ) Gone on a blind date.
(X) Lied to a friend.
( ) Had a crush on a teacher.
(X) Skipped school.
( ) Slept with a co-worker.
( ) Seen someone die.
(X) Seen a dead body.
( ) Had/have a crush on one of your MySpace friends.
( ) Been to Canada.
(X) Been to Thailand.
(X) Been on a plane.
(X ) Thrown up in a bar.
( ) Purposely set a part of yourself on fire.
(X) Eaten sushi.
( ) Been snowboarding.
(X) Met someone because of Friendster. - Yup, Mr Phay lo..
( ) Been moshing at a concert.
( ) Been in an abusive relationship.
(X) Taken painkillers.
(X) Love someone right now. - Mr. Yahp
(X) Laid on your back and watched cloud shapes go by.
(X) Watch planes fly by.
(X) Gaze at the moon and/or stars alone/with someone.
( ) Made a snow angel.
( ) Had a tea party.
(X) Flown a kite.
(X) Built a sand castle.
( ) Gone puddle jumping.
(X) Played dress up.
( ) Jumped into a pile of leaves.
( ) Gone sledding.
(X) Cheated while playing a game.
(X) Been lonely.
(X) Fallen asleep at work/school.
( ) Used a fake ID.
(X) Watched the sun set
(X) Felt an earthquake.
(X) Touched a snake.
(X) Been tickled.
( ) Been robbed.
( ) Robbed someone.
(X) Been misunderstood.
( ) Pet a reindeer/goat.
(X) Won a contest.
( ) Ran a red light.
( ) Been suspended from school.
(X) Had detention.
(X) Been in a car accident.
( ) Had braces.
( ) Eaten a whole pint of ice cream in one night.
(X) Had deja vu. - And watched it w my beloved.
( ) Danced in the moonlight.
( ) Hated the way you look.
(X) Witnessed a crime.
( ) Pole danced.
(X) Questioned your heart.
( ) Been obsessed with Post-It notes.
(X) Squished barefoot through the mud.
(X) Been lost. - Yup, lost in S'pore..*hurl hurl*
(X) Been to the opposite side of the country.
( ) Swam in the ocean.
(X) Felt like dying. - Yup, I even heard the devil's voice.
(X) Cried yourself to sleep.
(X) Played cops and robbers.
(X) Recently colored with crayons/colored pencils/markers.
(X) Did karaoke. - Yup, yest with him.
(X) Paid for a meal with only coins.
(X) Done something you told yourself you wouldn’t.
(X) Made prank phone calls. - My fav hobby
( ) Laughed until some kind of beverage came out of your nose.
( ) Caught a snowflake on your tongue.
( ) Kissed in the rain.
(X) Written a letter to Santa Claus.
( ) Been kissed under mistletoe.
(X) Watched the sunset/sunrise with someone you care about.
(X) Thought of marrying someone and have kids together. - Yup, him.
(X) Blown bubbles.
( ) Made a bonfire on the beach.
( ) Crashed a party.
( ) Have traveled more than 5 days with a car full of people.
(X) Gone roller-skating/blading.
(X) Had a wish come true.
(X) Worn pearls.
(X) Jumped off a bridge.
(X) Screamed "penis!"/ "vagina!"
( ) Ate dog food (or any other animal food).
(X) Told a complete stranger you loved them.
(X) Sang in the shower.
(X) Have a little black dress.
(X) Had a dream that you married someone.
(X) Glued your hand to something.
( ) Got your tongue stuck to a pole.
( ) Kissed a fish.
(X) Worn the opposite sex’s clothes.
(X) Been a cheerleader.
( ) Sat on a roof top.
(X) Screamed at the top of your lungs.
( ) Done a one-handed cartwheel.
(X) Talked on the phone for more than 6 hours straight.
(X) Stayed up all night.
( ) Not taken a shower for a week.
( ) Pick and ate an apple right off the tree.
(X) Climbed a tree.
( ) Had a tree house.
(X) Been scared to watch horror movies alone.
(X) Believe there is such a thing as the supernatural.
( ) Have more then 30 pairs of shoes.
( ) Worn a really ugly outfit to school.
( ) Gone streaking.
( ) Played ding-dong-ditch.
(X) Played chicken. - Chinese Ver.
(X) Been pushed into a pool with all your clothes on. - 20th Bdae
( ) Broken a bone.
(X) Been easily amused. - Always been
( ) Caught a fish then ate it.
( ) Made porn.
( ) Caught a butterfly.
(X) Laughed so hard you cried.
(X) Cried so hard you laughed.
(X) Had someone moon/flash you. - Yup, se peh peh
(X) Cheated on a test. - During K2
(X) Forgotten someone’s name.
(X) French braided someone’s hair.
( ) Shaved/ cut off your hair with a penknife.
( ) Gone skinny dipping in a pool.
( ) Been kicked out of your house.

Yesterday I enjoyed myself.
KTV session at Dynasty Peace Centre.
Well, it's the companion that's makes me happy actually.
After so many days of not seeing and talking,
it turned out to be a little too cold.
But I just want to treasure every moment with him now.

His singing improves a great deal.
Can sense his confidence in singing now.
I also notice he's wearing the shoelace that I gave him.
And he really look very handsome in his All Blacks.
Saying he'll sponsor me for my hair treatment as a gift.
That really melt my heart.
But I don't want him to spend unnecessary $$ on a friend.

If being friends is all he ever wanted again.
Friends we shall be.
Its not easy to find a soul mate.
I will learn to treasure him.
Every min and sec whenever we can be together.
I'll be contented.

I hope he'll make full use of the "Pandora" box that I gave him.
Reading aloud verses daily will definitely help him
to grow stronger in the Lord.
Jia you! I know you'll be a great leader!
Please don't bury your talents man!

Auntie-piggy-sun-ray, may you have a nice day & everyday. Ü

07 July 2007

I was watching crunchyroll, an old HK movie.
There's this man who travel thru time back to Qin Dynasty.
While he's there, he got to know a pretty and nice lady who treats him really well.
But every now and then, he'll dream of his GF who's still in Yr 2000 HK.

His buddies in Qin Dynasty all encourage him to marry the gal.
She's really nice and he likes her too.
But eventually he kept explaining that his worries is that the gal couldn't go back to HK with him.
And his buddy couldn't understand him...
He asked:" Why then do you have to leave in the 1st place. Just stay."

Even as I'm watching this show,
I really wished that he will go back to HK to reunite with his GF.
One really must not be selfish.
I must not.

I'm now like the gal in Qin Dynasty.
I'm his present, but unless he can let go of the past.
Then again, if I can stay strong and let him go,
the story might have a happier ending.
Don't you think so?

I really love him.
But there's no way of telling that to him anymore.
That's my only regret.
Please tell your loved ones today that you love him/her.
Do it before it's too late.

04 July 2007

Today is bdaeover day. I learnt a few things:

1) To break a bad habit,
replace it with a good habit.
Habits are hard to break.

2) To forgive him. Subconsciously,
I've been blaming him and its growing into hatred.
Stop it before its too late.

This song really is how I'm feeling.
Listening to it again and again..

I just cannot understand the hearts of men
they tell you they want you and then they leave you
this is the first time, you're special
I believed those words and I was so happy
you should have told me you didn't like me any more
but I couldn't see that and you just rushed me
although I will curse you I'll still miss you
since I am a girl, to whom love is everything

I heard that if you give up things too easily to a man,
he will get bored with you I don't think this is wrong
a girl says that she will never be fooled again
but she will fall in love again
you should have told me you didn't like me any more
but I couldn't see that and you just rushed me
although I will curse you I'll still miss you
since I am a girl, to whom love is everything

Hey babe
the pain it's not enough to describe how I feel
we were so happy together but I know now I've been blind
you told me that you'd never let me down
whenever I needed you you'd always be here
I can forgive but I cant forget even though you hurt me
I still love you
I still love you

don't take advantage of a girl's willingness to do anything for love
and her caring instinct
I didn't know that to be born as a girl and to be loved was so hard
although I will curse you I’ll still miss you
since I am a girl, to whom love is everything
although I will curse you I’ll still miss
you since I am a girl, to whom love is everything

01 July 2007

All Blacks

Should I get it for him?

Am I outta my mind?

I happened to walk past the shop today.

Well... Very tempted to give him a surprise.

But again, does he deserved it?

So what if he doesn't.

I like him. So I just wanna give it to him.

Nothing wrong with that.

Whatever...